Ice Woman

This blog has kinda become a dumping ground and I'm sorry, for those of you still reading (I totally would've deleted me by now!)

Who is Ice Woman?

Ice Woman is the name my sister has come up with for my other personality.  My Mr. Hyde if you will.  Ice Woman is harsh, cold, she's thick skinned, insensitive, irritable, bored, tired, impatient.  She slumps her shoulders, creases her brow, walks slowly and stubbornly, head towards the floor and there may even be some eye rolling involved.

Where did Ice Woman come from?

She was born, I'm pretty sure, around the time my dad passed away.  After my dad passed away I didn't stay home and grieve like any normal person did, Ice Woman made me run.  She went to school for me, interacted for me, although I know I was partly there too at the time.  But that was the start and I've noticed Ice Woman making more and more appearances lately.

When was the last time Ice Woman came?

She's here now.  I just went shopping with Drew and saw something on a muffin box that made her come. This said Something is everywhere at the moment.  And I don't know why it bugs her so.  I think she's just tired of it.  She's tired of a lot of things very quickly.  She's not naive about how serious things are.  No.  She knows first hand how serious it is, she's just insensitive.  Because she knows first hand she's become bored of it.  Bored of it being talked about.  Bored that it's everywhere.  Again don't get her wrong!  She knows what everyone's trying to do and it's a good thing.  But sometimes things get old quickly for her.  Then things in the news.  Why should people have to cater to others?  Again, just old and tired of people and certain situations.  Ice Woman is very unsympathetic.  So she came at the grocery store and when Drew got lost Ice Woman stayed.  Did I go running around looking for my lost child like any good mother should?  No Ice Woman was just annoyed.  Annoyed because Noelle had told Drew to stay be me because she'll turn herself around and end up with her back to me and start to freak out that I left her, when actuality I'll be right be right behind her.  If you can't tell it's happened before.  No Ice Woman was annoyed and kept shopping.  She waited as she picked her cheese.  She waited, although hoped it wouldn't happen as she scoured the aisles around her in hopes she'd spot Drew, and while she was waiting for her turkey to be cut, her waiting finally ended.

"Attention Walmart customers.  We have a lost Mom.  Could Noelle please come to the service desk?  Could Noelle please come to the service desk?"

Ice Woman waited nonchalantly for her turkey to be done.  Then slowly with slumped shoulders and a crease on her brow, walked over to the service desk. Ice Woman only gave an irritated scowl as she rounded the corner to the service desk.  She didn't run up to her daughter and give her a great big hug and say things like, "I'm SO glad you're safe."  Nope.  She just picked her up, gave a half smile to the lady behind the counter, and said to her beloved daughter, "You're never coming with me to the store again."  Ice Woman meant it too.

Ice Woman doesn't sound like a good mom.

Nope.  She's not.  And she's not a good wife either.  Instead of holding her husband with loving arms, she looks over his shoulder and looks at the mess he could've cleaned up while she was gone.  She doesn't hug him back and is only irritated that husband was trying to pick a freaking shirt, instead of just throwing one on and coming out to help bring the groceries in.

Would Ice Woman receive help?

Maybe.  I think she's so far gone, so much has happened to her that I'm not sure what could be done.  Really? She doesn't come THAT often.  She takes jabs to the stomach a little at least every day, but she doesn't stay very long, very often.  I don't think anything will help with her thick skin.  There's been times where she tried to break free.  She wanted to cry, and there's been a couple of success stories.  Last night I cried for my dear friend Megan battling cancer.  I cried for my friends getting a divorce.  I cried for a friend close to me in his goal to be the person he wants to be.  But sometimes I don't show up like when she was photographing the babies who passed away.  She tried crying because she felt like she needed to.  She was sad but nothing broke her thick skin.  She became immune and showed her husband the slideshow, not thinking he'd be affected by it.  Then something weird happened.  She saw something leak from his eye.  What was that? Oh, he was crying!  He asked Ice Woman to turn it off and she was dumbfounded.  Again don't get me wrong.  If it had been her child she wouldn't be here.  The real human would be here.  But she's not human and she has little feeling unless it's negative.  At that moment she was somewhat envious of her husband.  He had a soul.

Why couldn't Ice Woman have a soul?

She wants one and every time there's a chunk of ice chiseled off she's ecstatic!  But it's slow going.  There's a lot of hammering involved.  She has to let go of the ice.  She doesn't like it when her head is hot and bursting and is close to exploding.  She doesn't like that pit in her stomach and the heavy weight in her chest.  She hates being insensitive and soulless but I think sometimes she's worried what a blubbering idiot she'll become if she was sensitive to everyone and everything.  So for right now it's slow going.  Maybe one day, when her kids are older and more crap has happened to her to make things more personal, she'll melt.  Then again she could become stronger.

Update like a Christmas card

ALOHA!

It's been so long since I've posted on this blog.  I've really missed it and the connections I had with you guys that I haven't had since starting my other one.  We've been doing good and keeping buys with everyday life.  I'm really excited for this weekend.  After this weekend we would've attended 3 BBQ's.  That's how you do summer!

Drew is getting ready for Kindergarten next year.  Every day she wakes up and asks me if she's going to her big school yet.  I have to tell her not yet!  She turns 5 this month and I cannot believe how fast she's grown.  I also have to remember that she is still a little kid and needs to be treated as such.  I've seen too many people expect too much out of their oldest child.  It's SO sad and I know I'm guilty of doing this myself but when we expect our oldest to help us take care of their siblings I think we're asking them to grow up too fast.  Yes it's great when they do help, and nothing is wrong with them getting a diaper for us or helping capture a stray sibling but it's when we expect too much from them that I think can they can be really effected by things.  I dunno. What do you think?  Other than that tangent she is doing great, singing up a storm in church and having a blast playing with friend EVERYDAY!

Brody is 3 and he is a boy.  He is finally potty trained and it's going really good!  That took a lot of stress out of us and now he has the cutest Paul Frank BBD's ever!  One mistake we made during potty training is also the best thing we did to help him potty train.  Teaching him to pee outside.  Now where ever he goes he thinks he can pull down his drawers and go.  Oops!  Not only #1 but #2!  Thank goodness he's only done #2 in our yard but still, YUCK!  Brody is finally able to keep up with Drew and even take her down sometimes.  They fight quite often which is junk, I can't stand whining, but they get along really good when they do!

Alia is SO fun and SO busy right now!  She is climbing on everything, pushing all the buttons, opening drawers, pulling out clothes, books down, playing in the toilet, eating everything she can get her hands on but she is SO cute while doing it!  She absolutely loves her family!  She tries to talk but the only thing she's saying is Mom, that, please, and hello.  Everything else she just screams for.  She is 15. 5 months and I can't wait till she goes in the nursery.  She is the biggest distraction in our primary class but also our mascot.  Hahaha!

Kurt and I are doing good.  In late September it will be our 8th anniversary!  CRAZY!  We've been watching Avatar The Last Airbender for breakfast, lunch and dinner.  I don't know how the movie is going to level up to the tv show but I think it'll be fun to shave Brody's head, paint a blue arrow on it, and go see it anyways.  Is it totally against my nature to be more excited for that than for Eclipse?  Kurt is still a supervisor at the bucket factory, as we call it.  He has a weird schedule:  He works 2 days ,off 2 days, on 3 days.  Then the next week, 2 days off,  2 days on, 3 days off and repeat.  We actually like it but he still works the night shift and I'm not totally crazy about that.  Cedar is hot but treating us well.  We absolutely LOVE our ward which is good but I always wish I we lived closer to my sisters up north.
Well other than that SO much more but I just wanted to relay the basics.

Yes, it's me.

Wow I make it a point to be a better mommy blogger and actually update my family blog but it only lasts for one or two posts.  So not really.  For those of you who don't know I got a new professional blog, Studionoelle.com/blog!  I LOVE it and I'm super excited about the whole thing.  Well just wanted to let you know that my new blog is going to become my professional AND family blog.  I'm going to keep this one as well, in case there is anything too personal I don't want other people reading but if you want family updates follow my other blog.  I hope you stop on by because I'm going to be better updating and saying hello to you guys again.  See you soon!

Happy Birthday Brody Boy!

Brody had an awesome party with friends, balloons, streamers, cake, presents, and airplanes.  More on another post soon but for right now I want to spend quality time with my kids before I leave for Vegas for 6 days.  I love my boy to death and I can't believe he's 3!

Happy Birthday Brody!

I can glue it so can you!

Over on The Salty Pineapple Nikki is having a "You Can Glue It" week March 8th to the 12th, where you make a project with a hot glue gun.  Brody just had his 3rd birthday party, more to come on that soon, and his theme was airplanes.  So I thought it fitting to make him a runway, entirely glued.  To participate, make a project and post about it on your blog then add a button to your glue gun post!  

Happy glueing!

TMI

Drew had her first ever field trip and they went to Cedar City's Iron Mission Museum.  I was in town and met her class there to help chaperone.  I surprised her and she was SO incredibly happy that her mommy was there.  The kids learned how the pioneers made string into twine and twine to rope.

And even had a hand in making it.

Then we Round Robined over to the candle making station where the kids were able to make their own candles by dipping a wick into wax and then water.

Then we went over to the ... other station where the kids where told the story about the mormon crickets and California Gulls.  In short the Pioneers planted crops and thousands upon thousands of crickets started eating all their crops.  They prayed and the Lord sent Seagulls to come eat all the crickets.  So the kids learned that the California Gull is Utah's State bird and they were able to color some birds and hear the different calls of birds native to Utah.  My favorite is the Meadowlark!

The last station the kids learned that the pioneers had not running toilet, no running water, and every time they moved they had to build a new house!  YUCK to all of the above!  I seriously would've died!

Drew had so much fun with her class and I was so happy I was able to go!

I can't believe how big she is getting and how much more she understands and how much more I need to teach her.  She has been asking very adult questions lately and I have no idea how in depth I should answer her or not.  I wish there was a book for these types of things.  So for a little prelude we've been watching Heroes and she's been awed by these peoples powers and abilities and also we attended a funeral today of a mom of one of Drew's classmates that decided she wanted to return home to Heavenly Father.  So our convoy's have been going something like this lately:

"Mom P (her friend at school) said her mommy killed herself."

"Oh she told you that?"

"Yeah she said she didn't like herself.  How did she kill herself?"

"I'm not going to tell you Drew."

"Did she put fire on her?"

"No don't ask!"

"Did she cut herself?"

"No!"

Etc. till I finally told her.  And AMAZINGLY she came up with a lot of realistic things that I had no idea she even knew about but surprisingly she didn't guess the one till I told her.  Don't think I'm a bad mom but when she was guessing these things and wouldn't stop I figured she was old enough to know.  More Convoy's

"Mom how are we going to die?"

"I don't know Drew."

"Who is going to put something in us to make us die?"

"NO ONE!"

"Well when are we going to die?"

"I don't know.  Not till we're old!"

"But you're old!"

"No I'm not old.  Grandma's are old!"

"When you're a grandma are you going to die?"

"Probably but that's a long ways away.  Don't worry because we'll be with Heavenly Father!"

She thought for a second

"Where's heaven?  Is it in the sky?"

"Sure!"

"When we die how do we get there?"

"Um... we float there?"

"Like with powers?"

"Yeah!"

"Does Heavenly Father have powers?"

"Yes!"

"I want powers!"

"Then you have to be a good girl."

"Is that how Heavenly Father has powers?"

"Yup!  He was good when he was like you and so now he has powers."

"I'm going to be good so I can have powers!  I want to make things dance like the stove and the fridge."

:)

"Mom does P's mom have powers?"

"I don't know Drew."

"When I see P's mom again I'm going to give her a big hug!"

I was holding back the tears then.  At the funeral we started singing the opening song and Drew asked me if we were singing for P's mom.  I told her yes and she started bawling.  Music really moves her.  I don't know why it surprises me how much she understands.  It's not just that she understands what's going on but she understands the emotions of everything.  She then saw her friend P come in and they gave each other a big hug.  P sat with us for a couple of minutes.  Asked if her mom was up by the pulpit then she made her way up to her family.  Drew wanted to go with her but I wouldn't let her.  She then started throwing a fit and became like a lip noodle.  We ended up leaving during the eulogy because Drew was being so irreverent but I think it was her emotions that caused her to act the way she did.  Drew is only 4 and that was her 3rd funeral she's been to.  How sad.

This post started happy and I'm sorry it got sad and serious but I felt compelled to write our conversations down for memory purpose.  I hate not know what I should and shouldn't tell her so don't judge.  I'm still learning!

Previously on Reynolds...

Long time no see!  I have been so diligent taking photos of other people that I've become relaxed when it came to taking photos of my own family.  I told myself I would never do that but here I am, blogging after almost a month hiatus.  Oh well!  Please excuse the low quality pictures.  I don't have to think on this blog which I love.

Alia turned 11 months a couple of days ago and will be turning 1 year old on March 19!!  I cannot believe it!  This first photo was taken in the shopping cart.  We would shake it lightly and Alia would get these huge eyes, making us laugh hysterically!

Our niece Shawnie made Alia a hat out of a Styrofoam bowl and she didn't even try to take it off.  It was so funny!

We finally took Brody to get a haircut when Great Clips was having a huge sale.  I didn't realize how much he needed one till I look back at these photos and realize how long and nappy Brody's hair had gotten.  At first he didn't want to get a haircut because he thought only girls did that but then he was convinced boys got haircuts too when his dad got in the chair opposite him.

He was still pretty distraught with the whole process.

And so was Drew.

He was a lot happier after when he and dad looked alike.  Since then he's been walking around telling people about his haircut and won't stop telling them till they compliment him.

And Drew was happier too.

As for Kurt and I, we've been busy me, taking photos and Kurt with work.  We recently got into Heroes, streaming all the season's from Netflix.  Our nightly decision is : Sleep or Heroes?  Heroes!  YATTA! (I know I know 4 years too late) Now we go about our daily life wishing we had abilities and looking at different situations if we had certain ones.  Pathetically fun!  And we've officially become the worst parents, letting Drew watch with us.  There have been a couple episodes that are truly gory even for me. We'll pause it and make Drew leave for a minute and the entire time she's throwing a fit saying, "I want to watch him kill her!"  Like I said: Officially the worst parents!

till next month...  ;)

My first bridal shoot!

Check out the Photoblog to see more!

Brusha, brusha, brusha

Last Friday Drew had a dentist appointment where she had to get six, yes six, cavities filled.  Our dentist explained that Drew's teeth are very close together, that they usually don't get this close till they're almost six.  Why does that sound familiar?  Oh yeah because I had the same problem when I was her age.  Her teeth are screwed!

We get to the dentist office and while we wait this little boy who just had work done comes out and looks like he's in Lala land.  Top right hand corner.

She plays a little longer

in this awesome pediatric dental office that has this log home, country, ranch feel.  As we are watching the movie Spirit about a wild horse getting captured they come out and bring her, her sedative drink.

She became VERY happy.

Then VERY loopy.  And then she started getting emotional as she kept watching Spirit.  The receptionist had to change the movie because Drew was on the verge of tears when the soldiers were capturing Spirit.

Why don't they have a sedative like this for adults?

They ask the parents to remain in the waiting room so the kids don't freak out and try to get to their mom.  When the doctor came to get me he said that every child reacts differently to the sedative.  Most of them become calm and happy.  Drew became very talkative and kept asking the dentist if he was putting shinny teeth in.  They had to tell her not to talk a couple of times.  Before we went to the dentist Drew asked what they were going to do to her and I told her that she had ugly cavities and that they were going to take out the ugly spots and make her teeth shinny.  She was obviously worried about her shinny teeth.  I had to carry her and the assistant had to support her because she couldn't walk straight.  If the kids do good in the chair they get a prize.

When we got out to the car she wanted to see her shinny teeth and was so upset she couldn't see them.  She was weird for the first two hours after and then she became ornery!  She called her numb lips squishy and she kept hitting them.  As we were driving home she was complaining that she was talking funny, that her lip was squishy and then she said she was bitting something.  I looked back and she was chomping on her lower lip, hard.  She didn't break the skin but she left a huge impression.  She seriously wasn't herself till the next day.

But it was a funny experience and don't want to do that again for a while.